I have to do more work because you're stupid.

Isn't that the way it goes when we cater to the lowest common denominator?

I got in trouble at work today for knowing too much geography. If I can look at the UPS map and see that our transit time is going to be three days, I won't go to the time and trouble of running the transit time on UPS.com and printing it out. I wasn't running transit times on shipments that other people could not tell by looking would make it, because they "don't know the map that well."

Of course I am not to be trusted! So I am running transit times on every single thing now. Forget it. I am not even going to try to convince them that I know anything. I'll just dumb it down.

Dumb it down.

And that's what makes America so damn great!

Bling

I have my engagement ring! I am wearing it right now. After all of the daydreaming and showing internet pictures of the other set, I wound up with a plainly set solitare on a white gold band.



As soon as she set the loose stone in the ring at the store, I knew that I had it right. In truth, I could have opted for a larger stone, because I came in under budget, but I am extremely pleased with this one. It felt right, and I was not about to fight that. We have our wedding rings as well. I have a 2mm white gold band to set next to mine, and Dennis has a 4mm white gold band.

I've also sorted out my feelings about marrying again, and I am not nervous anymore. I'm just plain old in love now :-D

Every Day is Exacty the Same

Nothing ever happens during the week. Every day is the same routine, and there is very little spare time to do anything. This is a big change from a few months ago when I had unlimited free time.

Chris had his first Cub Scout Pack meeting last night. He looks so cute in his uniform, but he refuses to let me take his picture in it.

I do not have fuzzy feelings about my new job, and I am putting my resume out there in a very real way now. I like the people I work with directly, but that is about as far as it goes. I do not know how to work with backstabbing, double talking, busy body women. I am not like that, and I do not relate to it. One of the women who has been there for about eight years has decided that she does not like me. I don't figure I'll be sticking around for too long, even if I wanted to. I believe it's time for me to fly.

I am ignoring the fact that Dennis and I are engaged for right now. I think it needs to simmer. I'm not pregnant (I know you were thinking it) and we're not in any kind of hurry, so I'm not going to stress over it. We always do our best when we let things take their course. So I'm just going to sit and wait for a while. Nothing is going to change, and we can save up for that ring I want ;) *giggle*

Ring Shopping

I am still very bug-eyed about the engagement. I am very glad that there is no date set. I did not feel this agitated when the discussion was hypothetical. Now that it is real, all kinds of memories, anxieties, and fears are being dredged up. I didn't know that I would feel so uneasy about it. I know that I love Dennis, and I know that he is the guy I am supposed to wind up with, and I am not afraid of our relationship getting ruined. I am scared of that M word though. I don't think that I believe in marrying for love anymore. I don't know what a second marriage means for me. I don't know what marriage means to Dennis. We're talking about it. We're playing around with the idea. We'll get it sorted out, I know, but right now I am a little uncomfortable.

So we went ring shopping today.

I walked straight out of The Shane Co. Too crowded, too stuffy, and it was freezing cold in there too. Nevermind. It felt just like a crypt.

I looked at rings in Sears while Dennis tried on work pants.

I took Dennis to Kay Jewelers and let him take the full heat of the high-pressure sales people while I acted disinterested. Then I told the salesman who would not leave me alone that the last ring I got there broke, but I didn't bring it back because the marriage failed anyway. He still tried to sell around that. I got up and walked right out of the store. Dennis wasn't far behind, but he did get talked into taking a card and a Kay's special bridal magazine. He won't have to go through a lot of the traditional wedding experiences, but I thought that he should at least get a taste. I was amused.

We wound up at Jared at the Mills. I liked it there. I like a ring they have there. I know that I want this style. We looked at it with a center stone we can't afford, but I know that this is the general idea that I'm after.

Uh, yeah, I guess so...

Dennis asked me to marry him!

Last night we discussed the general idea of marriage, and I got on a tangent about expectations, and tax breaks enticing people to "do the right thing" and had myself in quite a negative frame of mind about the entire idea of marriage, when he said, "So, will you marry me?"

Silence.

"Are you being serious?"

"Yes."

"Really?"

"Really!"

"THIS is what I get? Well, since you are half-assing me, here's my answer, 'uh, yeah, I guess so'."

Followed immediately by a huge case of cold feet and self-doubt, and eventually I said, "This isn't fair! You can't get me all negative about a subject like this and then expect an overwhelmingly positive answer. I can't even see your face it's so dark in here! Are you serious?"


Then this afternoon, he asked me again. This time, he was getting ready to put on his socks, gave me a hug with a sock in each hand beind my back, and said, "Will you marry me?"

"Are you serious?"

"Yes!"

Again, a little pause, and finally, "Yeah, I will."




Yeah, I know, it is the most romantic story ever.

LOL

So apparently I am engaged. It isn't real yet. I don't have any thoughts yet. I am freaked out. I feel very bug-eyed.

Anniversary

It's been a year since I quit smoking.

My last cigarette was before bed on September 12, 2004. The first cigarette I didn't smoke was first thing in the morning on Monday, September 13, 2004.

Hooray!

That's something like 7300 cigarettes that I haven't smoked, and something like $1300 I didn't spend on the damn things.

Nobody remembered or said anything to me, but that's ok. I know. :-D

Tied-Arch

We went for a hike across the Missouri River Bridge on the Page Avenue Extension / Route 364 the other evening. Now, of course, I am curious about the bridge.

According to MoDot,

The bridge over the Missouri River connecting St. Louis and St. Charles counties and is actually two separate bridges. The structure itself is called a "tied arch" bridge because each arch is tied together with many steel cables. Each tied arch bridge was erected on bridge piers near the banks of the Missouri River. Four barges then floated each structure to their permanent position over the Missouri River. Each bridge will carry five lanes of traffic across the Missouri River, and the westbound bridge has a separate bike trail.

*Each tied arch structure is 616 feet long, 125 feet high and 90 feet wide
*90,000 cubic yards of concrete were used for the driving surface and bridge piers
*The structures contain 16 ½ million pounds of reinforcing steel
*78,000 feet of piling (beams drilled into the ground to support the bridge)
*3,000 feet of drilled shafts (the actual holes drilled into the ground)
*The steel girders and the two arches are comprised of 33 million pounds of structural steel
*The tied arches are held together by 444,000 bolts
*If the cables of the two tied arches were all connected, they would stretch 3 ½ miles
*It is 3,244 feet from the abutment on the St. Louis side to the abutment on the St. Charles side

Here it comes, that funny feeling again...

I can have selective amnesia when it comes to learning from my past. I am hearing sirens and seeing flashing lights at my job. I do not want to go through another fiasco on the scale of Miller Certified Air, ever again. Here I go again, my resume on Monster.com is updated, and I'm actively looking for work.

Why?

I do not want to be treated like a statistic. I do not want to feel my imminent replacablilty every single day. I do not want to live in fear of someone with some seniority who has decided that she will not like me. I do not want to have to fight tooth and nail for every penny of overtime that I am due. I do not want to have the fact that I know someone who got fired on her 82nd day hanging over my head. I don't want an unapproachable, two faced boss. (Another unapproachable, two faced boss...)

I know, that is a lot to ask, but for Christ's sake, I have a very expensive degree from and highly regarded University. So I'm going to take my happy little entitled ass elsewhere as soon as the opportunity presents itself.

Birthday Bash

Happy Birthday to you, Happy Birthday to you. You look like a monkey, and you act like one too...



We held Chris's birthday party yesterday in DuSable Park, along the Katy Trail, just north of Historic Main Street in St. Charles.

Paul's Family, my Ex-In-Laws, came out for the weekend. It was nice to see them, and yet somehow every strange at the same time. It is also always strange to hang out with Chris's Dad all day. Especially lately, since we haven't seen him for weeks. Pictures have been edited and uploaded to a Photobucket Album.

After the party, we all went for a browse around Historic Main Street. Paul Sr. bought us all a round of ice cream, we walked down to the river, and just hung out. All in all, it was a pretty good day.

The Times-Picayune

The New Orleans daily has been running an incredible web based version of itself since they lost the ability to print actual newspapers.

Nola.com has traditionally been a site that I've turned to for Mardi Gras webcams, New Orleans weather, and good hotel deals. Now it has become something entirely different. It is one of the few sources for very local coverage - right down to individual Parish reports. I've been reading it over my lunch hour at work every day this week.